- Don't have sex with someone who has not given you consent. That is rape.
- Don't assume that a lack of "no" means "yes". It does not.
- Don’t put drugs in someone's drink or coerce a someone into drinking.
- If you hear someone at the bar announce how drunk they are, don't let anyone, including yourself, take advantage of them.
- Don't assume the sexy outfit someone is wearing means they want you to force sex on them. It does not.
- Don't assume that someone who says "no" or "stop" means "try harder".
- Don't have sex with someone who is sleeping or unconscious. They cannot consent, therefore, it is rape.
- Don't assume that because you're married, sex is your spouse's duty. Without consent, it is still rape.
- If someone you know invites you to have sex with a person who seems incapacitated (i.e. drunk or drugged), don't do it. Instead, stop the person and call 911. You've probably just witnessed a rape.
- If someone you know is doing anything that sounds like 1-9 on this list. Talk to them. Challenge them. Intervene. Don't let another person become a sexual assault survivor.
This list began as something closer to a similar list that can be found here. I realized, however, with a little help from my wife and friends, that the message from the other list could be mistaken as insincere when read on this site. If you read the previous version of this list on this site and interpreted it as anything other than genuine, I apologize. The last thing I want to do is be someone who is "just trying to help" and inadvertently makes things worse. Well, this is a learning experience for me too. To all those who took time to share their experience and advice, thank you.
